FIREWORKS WITH FRIENDS!

So I met up with some friends last Thursday (yay I decided to have a social life for once), and as a last minute decision, we decided to go to see some fireworks being as it was going to be Bonfire Night on the Saturday. Despite the fact that it had been raining and that I was freezing (I couldn't feel my feet...fabulous), I still managed to have a good night even though my anxiety was trying to take over.

When I was younger, I was so scared of fireworks. I always ended up crying and would have to be taken inside because the loud noises terrified me. Now I am 20 years old, fireworks aren't scary to me anymore...especially compared to what scares me now. As I was watching the fireworks, I started to feel quite emotional. All of these jumbled thoughts started filling my head as I was reminded about how much of a bad place my mental health is in at the moment. But there was still a part of me that felt proud. Proud that I managed to leave the house. Proud that I managed to get on a bus for the first time in 3 months. Proud that I managed to be in a place full of so many people. Proud that I managed to see some of my favourite people. Proud that I actually was able to do something. 

It's the small achievements that matter to me. Most people probably think that I am doing nothing to help myself because I'm not achieving big things. But I am making achievements...it's just that they probably seem small to everything else but big to me. 

PS. Here is what I looked like (It's very rare for me to take selfies now so I thought I would be vain and post a couple of pictures on here...why not?!)

I washed my hair the night before and decided to double braid my hair so it was pretty cray cray (even though you can't really tell on these photos). Also, another behind the scenes story, I was going to wear my Kate Moss 107 lipstick but it didn't look right (To anybody who wears makeup...we have all had those moments where you want to cry when something doesn't go right...that was legit me) so I put on 08 instead which made my makeup look natural...sort of...okay lets forget about the fact I went dark with the eyeshadow...shut up, Jodie.

For my outfit, I decided on my Nirvana vest (more like a sleeveless top...but vest works I suppose...), black skinnies, converse, a zip up hoodie and a denim jacket. Now you are probably thinking "Jodie, I bet you were freezing?"...yes...yes I was but luckily, I did take a hat and gloves with me just in case it got colder later on in the day (this was before I knew we were even going to a bonfire...so well done to me...I am giving myself a gold star).


So yeah...
Halloween - Done
Bonfire Night - Done
Christmas - Now in full swing...so it's acceptable to listen to Christmas music and watch Christmas films now right?


Twitter: https://twitter.com/jodders_
Tumblr : jodderss.tumblr.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jodders_/

Bloglovin: https://www.bloglovin.com/people/jodderss-16784105